Somebody’s Showing Me Waaaaaaaay Too Much Monkey.

Now, I know Universal’s all excited about their new movie, Curious George, but they’ve gone straight bananas with the marketing of this bitch. I mean, really. I can hardly step out the door without being accosted by a freaking billboard with this monkey on it.

Yesterday I was out running errands, and just for—you guessed it—shits and giggles, I decided to count how many of those damn ads I saw in the course of the five square miles I covered while out.

I left the house at 3:48pm. I was back home by 4:37pm. And just how many monkey ads did I see?

===>24<===

That’s right, I said it:

===>24 ads of goggle-eyed monkey<===

In the words of the Elders: “That don’t make no damn sense.

It felt like some sort of assault, an invasion, all that freakin’ yellow and that ape with the binoculars. I would have stayed out longer, but I got so damned tired of seeing that trick-ass chimp, I raced back home to get away from it all.

Curiously, the Curious George billboards seemed to be placed in pairs. If you see one, odds are there’s another one a block away. Then you might go four blocks, and suddenly two more similarly-spaced simians smack you in the face.

Are you sick of seeing that ad yet?

I’m sure Universal probably intended this to have some sort of subliminal effect of making people feel compelled to see George after having been conditioned by all that signage, however, it’s had the opposite effect on me. The last thing I want to see is that ape. I feel like he’s stalking me. Stalking is never good. EVER. I’ve been running from this monkey. Why would I pay money now to go and see him?

Note to the marketing department behind this obnoxious campaign: peel some of them bitches back. Kids are probably having nightmares about that creature peering at them with those lenses. Parents are going to be shocked when they get their children in the theater and, the second George appears on screen, the whole place bursts into screams of terror.

Curious George, my ass. He’s a fucking peeping Tom.

Pervy monkey.

Universal Pictures: Curious George

7 thoughts on “Somebody’s Showing Me Waaaaaaaay Too Much Monkey.

  1. >roflmao!!! Lo – the trick-ass chimp is out to get yo loot… this is how our generation x get's caught up! they hypnotizing and seducing you – to be first in line on opening day – lol

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  2. >Lo: you must admit to your loyal readers that even though Universal was showing you the monkey all over the place, that you didn't even see 1 billboard until a certain someone pointed out that we had monkeys peeping at us all over the place! Please cure my sense of existential curious george angst! ha ha…

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  3. >Jen, woops…I mean, Anonymous is right, people. I didn't notice ANY of the monkeys the first go 'round. We were driving around LA (forever, huh, Jen?), and she pointed it out to me. But what did she want to do THAT for, because now the monkeys are coming at from at every turn. Jen showed me the monkeys, and now the monkeys won't stop!!!

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  4. >and now that I'm back in New York, the monkeys are on cabs! and commercials! But LA is truly plastered with monkeys, they've hit monkey saturation and then some. Seems like someone in marketing thought they better go big after King Kong!

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  5. >"LA is truly plastered with monkeys, they've hit monkey saturation and then some."ROFL!!! Okay, that sh*t has me ON THE FLOOR!!! Girl, if you don't get your Anonymous butt on a comedy stage soon, I'm going to march you onto one by force!!

    Like

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