Now, I know Universal’s all excited about their new movie, Curious George, but they’ve gone straight bananas with the marketing of this bitch. I mean, really. I can hardly step out the door without being accosted by a freaking billboard with this monkey on it.
Yesterday I was out running errands, and just for—you guessed it—shits and giggles, I decided to count how many of those damn ads I saw in the course of the five square miles I covered while out.
I left the house at 3:48pm. I was back home by 4:37pm. And just how many monkey ads did I see?
That’s right, I said it:
===>24 ads of goggle-eyed monkey<===
In the words of the Elders: “That don’t make no damn sense.“
It felt like some sort of assault, an invasion, all that freakin’ yellow and that ape with the binoculars. I would have stayed out longer, but I got so damned tired of seeing that trick-ass chimp, I raced back home to get away from it all.
Curiously, the Curious George billboards seemed to be placed in pairs. If you see one, odds are there’s another one a block away. Then you might go four blocks, and suddenly two more similarly-spaced simians smack you in the face.
Are you sick of seeing that ad yet?
I’m sure Universal probably intended this to have some sort of subliminal effect of making people feel compelled to see George after having been conditioned by all that signage, however, it’s had the opposite effect on me. The last thing I want to see is that ape. I feel like he’s stalking me. Stalking is never good. EVER. I’ve been running from this monkey. Why would I pay money now to go and see him?
Note to the marketing department behind this obnoxious campaign: peel some of them bitches back. Kids are probably having nightmares about that creature peering at them with those lenses. Parents are going to be shocked when they get their children in the theater and, the second George appears on screen, the whole place bursts into screams of terror.