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I received an email yesterday that gave me reason for pause. The email was from a female coworker who wanted prayer because her husband was seeking a divorce AND he wanted the judge to award him some money. That’s the part that threw me.
I don’t know about most guys, but to me it seems a bit on the “female dog” side for a man to be asking for loot in a divorce, especially if my soon to be ex is a middle class wage earner. This type of action is also similar to a guy asking for child support. Maybe I’m old fashioned, but that just seems a little twisted. Can somebody help me see what I’m missing here?
Posted by Rich (subbing for Lo)
The Lo Zone 
>But I am a good bytch LOLYou know I am sort of on the fence about this one. If collectively you have built something and she's the one who has wronged you in the marriage then I would say get yours. in the case of kids I think the parent who has custody should get support from the other because after all it's their child (children) as well.Now, I do believe a man should stand on his own but in my situation we had a prenuptial agreement because there was such a difference in our income/wealth. Basically she had more money than God and I was working paycheck to paycheck. But on the other hand, our friendship ended up being much more stronger than the relationship that I just think we signed on the dotted line and went our separate ways — sort of. We still work together, drive each other's cars, live around the corner from each other, and talk at least once a day on the phone. Go figure.
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>Thats a bitch type move, indeed!
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>Ironically, part of it is the backlash from feminism. I am not a feminist in the radical sense. I do believe women should have equal chances in the workforce and so forth just like men. Just like with racism, equal rights.I think some men want to have their cake and eat it too. I bet the same man who wanted support would dare not want it reversed.I have to say though some women are making things in such a way that men are more dependent on their income. There are women who let a man live with them and he does not work or barely does. She pays the bills, feeds him, clothes him and so on. So I can see if a man became accustomed to it, him wanting support after a divorce.I am part old school and new school. I do like a man with gentlemanly qualities, that does not mean I am a helpless woman who is dependent on a man. I am work and take care of myself. That does not mean a man cannot be in my life, he just has to know my needs for him are not based in just finances. I feel male or female, a grown azz person better have their business straight, so if they part, the only support of concern would be child support.
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>Alimony is out…that is something i just don't agree with period, on either side, why?
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>depending on the situation within the household, the responsibilities of the house, raising kids, blah, blah, blah…i think ol' boy must be making less for him to even ask that or it's the power move of going to the courts first, to knock her off balance emotionally.sounds like it'sa lot more to the story than him just bouncin' out and wants money, but if he's going the "bitch" route…here what she needs to do:1) stop praying for him to comeback. why? cause God allow'd him to leave to start with. if he does comeback, it ain't gonna be because of the "love" of her, it's because the shit didn't work out where he was going. y'all kno' the ol' cliche, "the grass ain't always greener on the other side"…there ya go!…if you do allow him back, make him earn the right for your love and household. you can forgive, forgetting comes with old age. stand strong, don't punk out or he'll do it again.2)stop crying and wipe yo' nose. pick yo'self up and get a phone book, go to the attorney section or better yet find one online. RESEARCH, RESEARCH, RESEARCH. when love goes outta a marriage, it's all business…handle yo' bizness!DON'T TELL NO ONE, EVEN YO' MAMA WHAT YOU ARE DOING….HE DOESN'T NEED TO KNOW YOUR FOOTSTEPS,(he'll find out 'cause family & friends talk) IF HE DOES, HE'S GONNA BLOCK YOUR EVERY PATH IN THE DIVORCE PROCEEDINGS.3)the kids (if any), he's gonna be their daddy regardless. you can't make him be the man he's supposed to be. he doesn't want the responsibility, trust me, God will guide you through the process. do all you can do.4)more than likely, if she is the bread winner, and was makin' mad loot before marriage, this was all a scheme from the jump. the nigga had a plan and now ready to execute the break! words from someone who's been there, done that….
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>It's because of men like him that when I do get married, I will be getting a prenupt…I don't care how much the man professes his love.
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